The difference between I and This

How many times have we been in a situation and thought “I can’t do this” or “I hate this” or any of the other “I…” sentences. Why does it always have to be an “I…” line? Why can’t it be a “This thing is” or “This situation is…” or any other “This …” line. It is important to understand that we are separate from the situation. Yes we are involved and impacted by the situation but it does not define us. The person who we are, cannot be fully described or understood by any one situation’s impact on us or our response to it. So why make statements that describe us and not the situation.

Also more importantly, what would saying “This is..” do for us that “I..” can’t? The answer, if we look carefully may perhaps be in the previous sentence itself. Being able to look at something from the outside and understand it clearly as something that is happening, without being prejudiced or influenced by our own self-image gives a bit of space between us and the event. The space can then give us clarity, flexibility and freedom to think about “What can happen” next rather than “What am I doing” now. Most times, the “What can happen” gives possibilities, one of which we can choose as the option we would like to have by performing the action that gives us that outcome.

These are very subtle differences in how we can deal with things and if we over-generalize, then it all looks meaningless and same. It is more about how we can experience the difference by trying this new perspective. Keep the “I” out of the way and see how things look with a different pair of eyes.

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